Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Potent and Impotent

Hello Broken Springers.

I hope you all enjoyed the seven day minute by minute coverage of Chief Kingston’s suspension. Readership was up during that time and I assume it wasn’t just because of the free donuts.

I can tell you one thing… when the Chief was suspended, I was initially elated. But after updating this blog for seven straight days, I’m hoping the Chief never gets suspended again. You hear that Jimmy Boy? I hope you never get suspended again. My fingers would fall off.

In all seriousness, I must commend the Police Commission’s decision to hold him responsible for his actions. And I mean Curly Headed Sandy and Jan Chaddwick too. It couldn’t have been easy to stick a knife in Jimmy’s back like that, let alone twisting it like you did. Good job, ladies!

Some of you may have noticed that the Picklefest is no more. Either that or they completely forgot about it. Not a whisper was mentioned in the Journalistic Error about it, and most people, when I asked them, said, “Oh yeah, I wonder what happened to it?” Not that I missed it, really. But for a couple years there, it seemed like we wanted it to be our claim to fame. Now we’re turning our backs on our gherkin friends. What gives?

In memory of the Picklefest, enjoy this joke:

A couple moves to Broken Springs and the guy gets a job at the local pickle factory. A few years go by and each year he wins the employee of the year award. One day in the third year, he comes home looking all depressed.

His wife asks him what's bothering him, to which he responds, "I got fired."

"Fired?!? How can you get fired, you're always employee of the year!!" she asked, stunned.

He responds that he had a fantasy that he needed to fulfill... “Well, I always wanted to stick my willy in the pickle slicer. “

"You didn't!" she exclaimed.

He blushed and replied, "Well, yes I did."

Then she asks, "Did it hurt?"

"No, not really," answers the man.

Puzzled, she then asks him, "What happened to the pickle slicer??"

He answers, "Oh, she got fired too!"

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